5-25

“On Sensing the Sacred...”

Genesis 28: 10-17 

There is no more enigmatic character in all of the Bible than that of Jacob. In one moment he is conning his brother out of his birthright and cheating him out of his blessing by deceiving their father. Then in another moment he is dreaming of or even wrestling with Yahweh.1 Jacob, it seems, is a hard character to get one’s arms around. In fact, the nation Israel found herself in the same position of not being sure that she liked this character. When he experiences the call of Yahweh his name is changed from Jacob to Israel — you cannot have a Cheater to be the blessed of Yahweh. 

Jacob is traveling — away from home, away from Esau and away from the “terrible” Canaanite women whom his father Isaac detested. He is on his way back to the region of Paddan-aram and to the city of Haran from whence his grandfather Abraham had journeyed. Back to find a wife — and away to escape the enmity of his brother, Esau. 

Darkness arrives and so he sets up camp at an out of the way place named Luz and later to be called “Bethel” — but I get ahead of the story. In good Middle Eastern fashion he lays down on the ground, finds a smooth stone to use it for a pillow and before he knows it he is fast asleep. Walking all day while traveling makes sleep quick and easy. Then he begins to dream and in so doing envisions a ziggurat, a stair-stepped, pyramid type structure extending to the heavens. On that structure are angels, ascending and descending — but to what purpose we have no firm idea, only conjecture. Suddenly his dream is interrupted by a vision of Yahweh speaking to him. In this vision is communicated the same promise, the same covenant which had been given to Abraham & Isaac now is extended to him. He shall be the father of a great nation and all the lands which he can see will one day belong to his descendants. 

Suddenly Jacob awakens, sits up — and begins to realize what has happened. Yahweh has shown up in his life; Yahweh has come and spoken to him. What seems like a dream is reality, pure, true reality. When one deals with the Sacred the line between fantasy and reality is often blurred, is it not? I love his statement: “Surely the Lord is in this place and I did not know it! How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God and this is the gate of heaven.”2 

What does it take for us to sense, to feel, to see, to sense the presence, to hear the voice, to experience the Sacred One? Where does this happen for us and why? Do we come to worship expecting the Sacred One to show up on Sunday? Do we ever look around and wonder why it is that the Sacred One seems to show up for others, but not for us? Could it be that the ability to experience the Sacred lies within each of us, but too often we are so caught up in ourselves that we are blind to the pullings and tugs of the Sacred? 

The Jews believed that there were places on earth which were “gates” to heaven, i.e., doorways through which one could experience Yahweh. Later the Celts would develop an idea of there being “thin” places through which one could have similar experiences. Unfortunately, in our pragmatic, mathematical, rationally logical and logically propositional world, we rarely experience these. We are so caught up in “belief” and “proof of the Sacred” that we rarely have time to experience the One who is already here and knocking on our door. 

Being children of the Reformation and the Enlightenment we believe in scientific methodology and theological proof. Unfortunately, (for us) faith is more mystery than it is knowledge, more of the poet and less of the mathematician. True faith is more about dimly seeing the hand and perceiving as through a fog the face of the Sacred and less about certainty and assuredness. We confuse belief with faith and so we impoverish our souls. The Sacred of the universe will not be contained in our little boxes nor imprisoned in our feeble minds. As with Jacob, so with us: the Sacred shows up in dreams which seem to be fantasy but which, upon examination, bear nothing less than the reality of the Sacred. 

So often in reading a text such as this people will look to the minister to give them the “correct” interpretation. Tell us what it means, preacher, so we can eat our meals and rest easily in our beds at night. And we preachers, wanting you to think that we are really smart, give you the answers which sound reasonable or rational to us. There’s just one problem with that — the Sacred is not always reasonable or rational or easily understood. Who really knows what this text, with its image of angels ascending and descending means? Commentator after commentator, scholar after scholar have all intoned as to their particular understandings...but the exact truth escapes us all. Yes, this is about Jacob receiving the blessing and experiencing Yahweh in the process...but that’s about as far as we can nail down. In this occasion, as in so many other, the meaning often depends upon who is doing the interpreting, i.e., upon the life experiences and understanding of the reader. This is a text for poets, not lawyers. (The Book of Leviticus — now that’s a lawyer’s text!) 

Let’s take a few moments and review our lives in recent days. Did the Sacred show up for us? How did we know it was the Sacred? Were we anticipating the Sacred? Seeking the Sacred? Could it be that the Sacred has tried to show up for us and we were not looking? 

I am afraid that we ministers have done you a disservice in this “Sacred One” business. We have told you that if you come to church, behave yourself, and treat people nice then you will go to heaven when you die. We have even promised that maybe, just maybe, if you are pious enough, then the Sacred may show up here at church one day. 

Now, to be sure we who lead worship work very diligently to prepare our worship so that we all might have a chance to experience the Sacred. However, I can assure you that you are just as likely to experience the Sacred anywhere else as at church. Why? Because here we put on our blinders and expect the Sacred to show up in the sermon or the hymns or some other designated point in the worship service. We serve and worship a Sacred One who doesn’t fit so well into our boxes or follow our patterns as neatly as we think. We are just as likely to experience the Sacred on a seashore, in the mountains, at a homeless shelter or sharing a meal with family and friends as in a Sunday morning worship. There is something about this structured, formalized nature of worship that so constricts our soul and our senses, that most Sundays the Sacred would have to use a sledgehammer to get our attention. Now, to be sure, the Sacred is not above using such devices...so I would beware when I came to worship. But I also would beware when I lay down at night...or when I wake up...or when I eat...or think...or reflect...or stare off into the distance. For if I believe anything, I believe that the Sacred is ever trying to awaken us out of our slumber and come alive in our souls. 

Why come to worship, then, you ask? Simply, regular worship builds in us an awareness that the Sacred is present and calling to us. You may never have a “eureka” moment in church...but over time what you do and hear in this place will make a profound difference in who you are. One day, after years of worshipping and serving in a church, you will realize: “I am different...my values are different and my faith is deeper than it was...” Slowly but surely, over the cascade of time, like a river pouring over rock, your soul has been shaped in this place and time by the Sacred. 

If there’s one thing that attracts me to Jacob it is that he was nowhere close to being a good person. Conning his starving brother, then deceiving their father and cheating his brother out of the birthright — later he will even cheat his father-in-law out of the best of the herds. No, Jacob was a con artist, a flawed “hero” if there ever was one. He represents the Cool Hand Luke type of character as played by Paul Newman in the movie of the same name; or “Will Hunting” as played by Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting. They are the intelligent, likable but rogue character who lives on the edge of civility. Yet, because he was alert and awake to Yahweh, he sensed Yahweh’s call and promise when others missed it entirely. Me — I would have chosen Esau, a man’s man. Not Yahweh — he goes for the Jacob character every time. Tells us something about Yahweh, does it not? I wonder how we missed that clue? 

Experiencing the Sacred is not a matter of proper theology, correct ethics, or a flawless resume and life. Coming to faith and experiencing the Sacred is about being aware, awake and alert, i.e., conscious to what is going on in the world and to the Sacred’s presence. Remember how a poet put it?
Earth’s crammed with heaven,
And every common bush afire with God;
But only he who sees, takes off his shoes,
The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries...3 


For all his flaws Jacob had a sensitivity to the holy, to the presence of Yahweh in and around him. Esau — when it came to Yahweh he was as dumb as a bag of hammers. He had no sense of values, of priorities or of Yahweh’s calling. Jacob sensed Yahweh’s presence and so it was Jacob who answered the call. He even piles up stones — builds a memorial — and calls it “Bethel” — the house of God. Bethel becomes rather famous as an altar and house of God until it is destroyed centuries later.
If we were to go backward in our lives, where would we build our monuments, our memorials to those times when we experienced the Sacred? Where would we pile up the stones to commemorate how the Sacred has worked in and through our lives? Would we go back to an “old home place” and there pile stones together? Would we go back to a church, a school, a camp, or a time? Would we pull out a book, a text from the Bible, or a song as symbolic of those times when the Sacred was so close and so real? Would we walk along a shoreline or venture up into the Appalachians? 

It is my belief that potentially the entirety of life is holy and sacred — there is no place or time that is too far for the reach of the Sacred or that cannot bear the presence of the Sacred. There are no people who are too far removed to hear that Voice, see that Face or feel the touch of the Sacred’s hand upon their shoulder. What there are, however, are people who are so blind, so deaf, and so

insensitive to the presence of the Sacred One that they, rather than worship, are just picking blackberries. There are Jacobs and there are Esaus...which are we? 

An older man was once admitted to a hospital, terminally ill, angry and striking out at anyone and everyone who tried to help him. After a week or so the staff were beside themselves and out of answers as to how to help, so they summoned the chaplain. He engaged the patient in conversation but then left after 10 minutes or so. “Not ready” was his summation. 

A few days later a nurse called the chaplain: “Mr. Smith is crying and cannot stop. He’s completely broken and wishes to see a minister.” As the chaplain rounded the corner to enter the room he was heard to mutter under his breath, “Well, the Sacred got another one.”4

What will it take for us to wake up and see the the Sacred One who is before us? How hard will the Sacred One have to hit us before we awaken and say with Jacob, “Surely the Lord is in this place — and I did not know it?” 

Amen.

1 In this sermon I am avoiding the generic term “God” and using Yahweh for the God of Israel. I am also using the term “the Sacred” for the God whom we meet. The term “God” is so over worked and misinterpreted that I believe it is virtually meaningless. The only change to this practice is when the Hebrew prefix/suffix “el” is used to designate God.
2 Genesis 8: 16, 17.
3 Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Aurora.
4 Dr. Will Willimon, The Dark Adversary, February 4, 1996. 

5-18

“Overcoming Our Anger”

I Samuel 18: 6-16; Ephesians 4: 25-27, 29-5: 2

We live in a world of anger, hostility, and rage beyond our wildest comprehension:

• “Road rage,” violence and killing on the highway are becoming normative in the densely packed cities.
  
• Spousal abuse and violence in the home continues to plague our society.
  
• Terrorism, both political and religious, seems to never cease.
  
• Young people, seemingly frustrated by their lot in life, take guns and go to their schools where they inflict unbelievable horror.
  
• For a while so many postal employees started acting out their rage that we developed a new phrase — going postal. 
  
  
  Why? Why are we so angry? Why do we have such violence and rage within so that even the least little act produces the desire to kill? What can we do about our anger?
  Saul is angry -- better yet, let’s name his anger: he is jealous, resentful, and full of bitterness toward David. David has killed Goliath -- a feat that Saul should have accomplished but was too cowardly to try. David and Jonathan -- Saul’s son and heir to Saul’s throne -- had become best friends. David was living with Saul and Jonathan, but Saul soon perceived that David’s popularity was getting out of hand. David was a highly successful soldier and commander -- even though he had no military training. David was musically gifted and a great writer of poetry as many of the Psalms attest.
  
  
  Yet, there was another reason for Saul’s jealousy. Verse 12 of the 18th chapter of I Samuel says it best: “Saul was afraid of David because the Lord was with David but had left Saul.” Saul is unfaithful to God and now he sees that God has sent another to take his place. Saul’s sin was in disobeying God by not destroying all the property of the Amalekites. Rather, he kept the property for himself thereby showing that his Kingship was not about serving the Lord, but he was out for himself. God rejected Saul as king and uses the prophet Samuel to deliver that message. Now Saul realizes that the rejection is not just of himself, but of his lineage and that Jonathan will never become king after him -- David will be the king for the Lord is with him.
  How hard that must have been for Saul to watch as David’s actions were blessed by God! Anger built up in him as guilt and jealousy mingled to create resentment and bitterness. Time and again he sends David out on dangerous missions where he should have been defeated and killed. Time and again David returns victorious. For the rest of his life Saul will vainly pursue David trying to kill him, somehow believing that if David is eliminated then Jonathan will be king. 
  
  
  Anger is one of the more difficult opponents we will ever face in our lives, because anger works subtlety to convince us that we are not in the wrong. The phrase “she is so mad she cannot see straight” illustrates this point completely. Saul was so angry that his thinking had gone completely haywire and he was now out of control. Anger distorts our perspective and as such is used as a tool of the Evil One to disrupt our world. Evil thrives on self-deception and when we allow anger to rule us we open ourselves to evil.

Anger masks itself in so many ways. Rarely do I see incidences of violence in congregants lives or families. What I see is passive-aggressiveness in anger — where a person smiles at others on the front-side but works behind the scenes to undercut and to bring doubt and confusion. Many a family presents the image that all is well — yet when you talk with the children you discover that the emotionally weaker or “passive” parent is undercutting the “dominant” or stronger parent.
Inherent in our struggle with anger is our supposed “Christian” understanding of anger as a sin -- and therefore wrong. We were not allowed to express our anger -- that would be blatant sin -- so we repressed it, pushed it inside. We developed other words to deny and conceal our anger: hurt; disappointment; frustration; upset. When we repressed our anger it was as if we placed a lid on a boiling kettle and turned up the fire: sooner or later that kettle would explode. And explode it does -- either through violence to others or to ourselves. We are like the rattlesnake, which in circumstances where it is angered and has no other option, will bite itself, poisoning itself. Anger repressed creates the situation in which we turn upon ourselves in destructive behavior. Crucial to understanding anger is the reality that no one else can really make us angry — they can only reveal the anger which is inside of us. If we blame another for making us angry then we are but allowing them to control us. 

Anger is a normal human reaction that is both primarily physiological in origin. When we become angry our blood pressure rises, adrenaline is secreted in larger doses than normal, and sugar is released into our bloodstream. Our heart beats faster and our eyes dilate. This physiological response goes back to the origins of humankind and our living in situations where, when threatened, we had to “fight or flight,” to physically defend ourselves. The physiological response is a means of increasing our ability to defend ourselves or to escape danger. The problem is that, in our culture, threats are rarely of the type that demand a physiological response. However, the response mechanism — along with the adrenaline secreted in our system — is still there. When we repress this response we create the aforementioned pressure cooker. 

The desert monastics had an understanding of the human personality as a chariot pulled by two horses (passions): desire and anger. The charioteer was reason, but when the passions took over reason was lost and the chariot would careen out of control.
What can we do so that when we become angry we do not careen out of control or sin -- as Paul says -- but deal with our anger creatively and constructively? 

RECOGNIZE
First, we must recognize our human propensity to anger and discover the sources of our anger. Have you ever had someone tell you to calm down and you replied, “Mad? I’m not mad!” We need to reflect upon our behavior and understand what reveals our anger. Where is the threat to us or our family? Is it real or is it imagined? Why are we threatened? Is it financial? Social? Spiritual? Vocational? Is our response appropriate to the situation or are we overreacting? Is our anger indicative of our own lack of self-esteem, the sin of not seeing ourself as a child of God?

There is one type of anger that can not only be useful, but has its source in God: righteous indignation. The Bible speaks of God being angry toward sin and evil and what they have done to creation. God’s wrath is not sin, but his conscious and never failing opposition to all that is evil. When we see people being taken advantage of, used, and abused by others, then there is something that rises within us. This anger can be an incredible positive as we use its energy and passion to focus us in the proper perspective. I have never met a person who accomplished anything in life who did not have a fire burning inside, who did not have a passion about what they are doing. However, successful people learn how to manage that passion rather than to let it control them. 

An all too common practice is to misplace the focus of our anger. When someone or something disappoints or frustrates us, but we cannot respond to them for whatever reasons we will repress that anger and then let it out at someone or something where we feel safe. The typical analogy is not far from the truth: The boss makes us mad so we go home and fight with our spouse. Our spouse makes us mad so we take it out on the kids or the dog. 

If overcoming our anger is to be of vital importance to us, we must understand the devastating effects of anger upon the soul. Roberta Bondi lists three such effects noted by desert monastics:
• Resentment blinds the reason of the one who prays.
• Brooding over injuries and wrongs suffered destroys our memory of God and God’s grace.
• Anger irritates the soul and during prayer it seizes the mind and flashes the picture of the offensive person before one’s eyes. 

These effects upon our soul are the reason Jesus taught us to make peace when we want to come before God. If we are not at peace with our fellow human beings we will find ourselves unable to pray, unable to focus, unable to do the things that we should do. They and the situation, not God, will be first and foremost in our lives.
CONFESSION
After recognizing our anger we need to accept responsibility for our wrong use of anger and confess it to God. Confession is an admission of helplessness, that without God there is no telling what we would do. Through confession we are liberated from our anger. 

Anger unresolved can be a terrible, terrible burden, which becomes like a ball and chain so that we are condemned to pull it behind us. In time this anger becomes so much as part of us that our identity is wrapped up in this anger. Who would I be without my rage? My indignation? Too often we accept the role of victim and in so doing condemn ourselves to a lifetime of anger and bitterness. Confession allows us to give that anger and bitterness to God and walk away from it -- ready to start a new chapter in our lives free from the bondage of the past. 

Prayer can be a meaningful practice to release our anger. Have you ever what we call the “imprecatory Psalms?” Wow, there is some anger let out in those! The Psalmist asks God to bash his/her enemies and to destroy all their enemies’ heirs. Listen to Psalm 58: 6-7:
“Break the teeth in their mouths, O God; tear our, O Lord, the fangs of the lions!
Let them vanish like water that flows away; when they draw the bow, let their arrows be blunted.

Like a slug melting away as it moves along, as a still-born child, may they not see the sun.” 

These are honest prayers, confessing the depths of our anger to God. I am not sure we ought to pray these prayers regularly, but I am sure that we should confess our anger to God and the reasons for our anger. Jesus taught us that central to our prayer is praying for our enemy, for the person with whom we are in disagreement. Despite what we feel, any disagreement is a two-way street and we can never assume that we are totally in the right and the other is completely wrong. If we can see them as a fellow child of God that will go a long way toward dissipating our anger. 

EXPRESS ANGER APPROPRIATELY
After confessing our anger and praying over it, we need to express our anger appropriately. This may include going to the person and discussing the situation; going to counseling to work on healing the wounds of the past; getting involved in changing a social situation; or going to marriage counseling to work on our relationship with our spouse. There is no law that says that anger cannot be used to build rather than destruct, to create rather than to tear down. The positive nature of anger is that, if we will allow it, anger will reveal to us the places in our soul where we need work, our weak spots where we need healing. 

“I am redeemed...but there are unredeemed parts of me....There are parts of me that have not yet heard the good news of Jesus Christ.” When I first heard that statement something clicked in my understanding of human nature and our relationship to God. For years I had been tormented by the fact that Christians, those who claim the name and power of Jesus Christ, continued to act in ways decidedly out of sync with our Lord. Paul may call us saints, but deep inside we know ourselves to be sinners. Nowhere is this more vivid than in the arena of anger. Despite all our professions about transformation to the contrary -- we still struggle with anger and its composite parts: rage, jealousy, frustration, resentment, bitterness and the like. It was only after hearing this statement that I began to understand life in Christ as a progression of development and growth. Rather than Christ instantaneously removing all the imperfections of sin from our lives, they are left for us to slowly remove through the power of the Spirit. 

Crucial to creatively dealing with anger — and to our entire pattern of spiritual growth — is to become “other centered” rather than “pleasure centered.” A fellow minister wisely said, “If we do not make that critical shift, we will not only be unchristian, we will also be miserable.” Depression can be nothing more than anger repressed and held onto for years and years and years. If we cannot make the shift from the pleasure centeredness we knew as babies, children and adolescents to the other centeredness required for maturity we will be miserable. None of us are the axis around which the world resolves. At best we occupy a small portion of this terra firma for a few years and move on. If we cannot move to servanthood as our modus operandi we will build up residual anger and be completely unaware of it. Then one day, boom: the heart attack, stroke, ulcers -- or we lose it completely over nothing. 

So there you have it: recognize, confess, and appropriately express our anger. Let us not be a Saul, controlled by our anger so that we become a tool of evil rather than good. Let us be a Paul -- in our anger do not sin. We will all be better for it -- and so will our world. The Kingdom of God does not come through anger and force, but through the wind of the Spirit. Hear the words of St. Paul

which close our text: “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children, and live in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” Ephesians 5: 2

5-11

“Reflections on God and Motherhood...” 

Believe it or not, one of the greatest challenges of the Christian year for ministers is Mother’s Day. Now, I know that sounds crazy to most of you, for you’re thinking: “What’s so hard about Mother’s Day? Just talk about motherhood and apple pie and everyone will be fine.” As a congregant once said to Robert Fulghum: “I’m bringing my MOTHER to church on MOTHER’S DAY, Reverend, and you can talk about anything you want. But it had better include MOTHER and it had better be GOOD.” Fulghum added: “She was joking — teasing me. She also meant it.”1 

Why is Mother’s Day a problem for ministers? Well, consider the fact that on that day most of us want to worship some sort of syrupy, sentimentalized, Hallmark version of how great motherhood is and how wonderful all our mothers were. Except for the fact that motherhood is not great for everyone. The reality is that not all mothers were wonderful; not all women enjoyed motherhood and not all children were easy to raise. In fact, raising children may be the hardest job any one could possibly have. Now, add in the fact that many women who would like to be mothers are not — for all kinds of reasons — and you have a prescription for conflicted emotions and potential disaster. 

Now, consider the truth that we come to church not to worship any human being — mothers or fathers — but to worship God. There have been some Sundays on Mother’s Day when I questioned who we are worshipping. So, the dilemma for us ministers is critical: We must recognize these realities, but also know that if we ignore Mother’s Day we are digging our own grave — and quickly. Most congregants want the minister to say something good about mothers, motherhood and God, usually in that order.

So, the more I thought about this the more I came to see that we can use this day to answer a simple question: Being people who believe in Incarnation, who believe that God dwells in us, how does the image of motherhood and women reflect for us the reality of God? What do we know about God through the lens of mothers and motherhood that we otherwise would not know? 

Before you jump out of your seat and call me a heretic, let me tell you from whence I come. I believe, as does orthodox Christianity, that God does not have a sexual identity, for God is Spirit — not a physical being. Genesis tells us that God created human beings in his image, “male and female created he them.”2 The reality is that Holy Scripture affirms from the beginning that both male and female are contained within the Being we call God. To be sure we have historically used male images for God, primarily because Scripture developed within male dominated cultures. As we humans have matured in our understandings we have realized that God is neither male nor God a female — for God is Spirit and as such both images are contained within God’s Being. 

A quick word of caution is appropriate when we come to talk about the feminine nature of God. A perusal of religious history also allows us to realize that a vital distinctive of Judaism and Christianity was their ability to separate sexuality from their understanding and worship of God. As a result of this foundational separation Christianity does not have gods and goddesses — a la other religions. When we talk about the femininity or the motherhood of God, we are not referring to goddesses in any shape, fashion or form. We are talking about a wholeness, a unity, a oneness of God such that God’s essence is reflected in all of humanity, male and female. 

Are we aware that Holy Scripture backs us up here? In our texts this morning we see God being understood in feminine imagery:
Like birds hovering overhead, so the Lord of hosts will protect Jerusalem; he will protect and deliver it, he will spare and rescue it.3 God is seen as a hovering mother hawk who watches over her nest and protects her offspring. 

Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to it! How often have I desired to gather your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing!4 God is envisioned as a mother hen who gathers her chicks under her wing and protects them. 

As mother comforts her child, so I will comfort you; you shall be comforted in Jerusalem.5 God is portrayed as a mother consoling and comforting her child. 

Though we have ignored the feminine reality in much of our religious life and heritage, envisioning God as male and female enhances our images and understandings of God. Our vision of God is cloudy at best. When the task is understanding God, we do “see through a glass darkly.”6 We use images, metaphors and analogies to help us comprehend the infinite, the Spiritual, the One who is beyond us in so many, many ways. In the Christian church God was understood as revealed in Jesus Christ — and quite particularly in his suffering and crucifixion. These are symbols of loss, of self-sacrifice and of the ultimate in self-giving. The God whom we meet in Jesus Christ is the God who works from beneath, not from above. Despite how Jesus has been co-opted through the years, his is not the image of a militant God who leads us to victory. Jesus is the image of the crucified God, who lays down his life. When we omit either the male or female side of God we worship a false God, an idol made in our own image. 

There is one caveat we all must hear: we dare not confuse the symbols and images of God with the reality behind them. To identify God as exclusively male or female is to de-sacralize God, the result of which is idolatry. When we use these symbols we are allowing them to picture for us the characteristics of this one whom we cannot “see” in any complete sense of the word. They are, however, all mere symbols and images of the divine. 

So, to restate the question: How does understanding God as encompassing female and motherhood within God’s Being enhance our understanding of God? 

The first thing I notice is that when we emphasize this aspect of God, we tend to look more at the loving, compassionate and tender nature of God. To be sure, there are women who are neither loving, compassionate nor tender — just as there are men who are this way. However, on the whole, when we talk about how we see and understand God through our mothers, we tend to come to these aspects. 

When we use solely masculine images for God, the result is a male-dominated version of God that is patently false. Exclusive male images for God too often result in our worshipping a “warrior God” who leads us into battle and supposed victory. Though these images may have dominated the Hebrew Scriptures’ understanding of God, they did not do so in the early Christian church. 

The reality is that for most of us our first experiences of love, compassion and tenderness came through our mothers. The nurturing Mother is for us, when we are infants, a substitute for the nurture of God. For most of us (and I am extrapolating from personal experience to generalization) loving acceptance came through our mothers more than our fathers. I know that in my home, even with five children, my mother was the one who listened, who comforted and who forgave. My father was the goal setter, the rules-oriented parent, the one who doled out discipline and punishment. 

Now, to be sure we could not play one against the other. If one parent said something, the other backed them up. But, more often than not, if Dad was being overly strict (as he was prone to be) then Mom was the one who would talk with him and get him to relent.
In my Mother I experienced love so accepting and so complete that there was literally nothing I could do that would stop her from loving me. She had a capacity for love and acceptance that was boundless. I know this same love in Debby (my wonderful wife) — not only for me but also for our sons, their spouses, and yes, grandchildren as well!! At the risk of stereo-typing (a risk I have long ago run roughshod over) the feminine expression of love is much greater than the male. I have often wondered how much of God’s love I would really, really know if it were not for my mother and my wife. They have helped me immensely to change the very nature of the love which I show to others.
Mothers are about “ensouling” us — developing and nurturing our soul. Through these women in my life I have developed my senses of feeling, of loving and of intuition far beyond what I had known. These values, so necessary for our success and survival, are often lost in our male- dominated world. We men can become so bottom line, results-oriented that we fail to remember that the journey is the destination. 

Years ago a colleague told of looking into a shop window and seeing price tags which seemed to be inherently wrong. What was expensive was cheap and what was cheap was expensive. He entered the shop and inquired if the prices were right. After examination by the shop owner it was discovered that someone had switched all the price tags. In order to get the true price and value, they had to be switched back. 

We live in a world where all the price tags have been switched. What the world says is of value — possessions, things, material goods, etc. — these are but trinkets in the larger understanding of life. What God says is of value — love, grace, mercy, forgiveness — the nature of one’s soul — these are seen as worthless in our material world. Mothers can be a strong dynamic in allowing us to put the price tags back on properly. 

In the play, A Raisin in the Sun, the young man comes home, having lost all the families’ money and in so doing destroyed all their hopes, their dreams. His sister, Beneatha, calls him every despicable name imaginable. After she curses out her brother, the mother speaks and says: 

 "I thought I told you to forgive him.” 

"Forgive him? There's nothing left to forgive."

There is always something left to love. And if you ain't learned that, you ain't learned nothing. (Looking at her) Have you cried for that boy today? I don't mean for yourself and for the family 'cause we lost the money. I mean for him: what he been through and what it done to him. 

Child, when do you think is the time to love somebody the most? When they done good and made things easy for everybody? Well then, you ain't through learning - because that ain't the time at all. It's when he's at his lowest and can't believe in hisself 'cause the world done whipped him so! 

When you starts measuring somebody, measure him right, child, measure him right. Make sure you done taken into account what hills and valleys he come through before he got to wherever he is.”7 

Through our mothers we learn to “measure him right,” and to share with one another the love and grace of Jesus Christ. So, even if this is a difficult day for you — celebrate and rejoice. Through our mothers we are given life and an understanding of the One who calls us to life and life eternal. Thanks be to God for motherhood — and our Mothers. May they ever nurture, strengthen and lead us to God.

1 Robert Fulghum, “It Was on Fire When I Laid Down on It.”  
2 Genesis 1: 27
3 Isaiah 31: 15
4 Luke 13: 34-35
5 Isaiah 66: 13
6 I Corinthians 13: 12
7 Lorraine Hansberry, “A Raisin in The Sun.”

“When Your Days Grow Short”

II Timothy 4: 6-8

The photograph in my mind is one that I have never seen, but have imagined many times. St. Paul, now old and feeble, body wracked from persecution and beatings but mind still sharp and focused, is dictating to a scribe (maybe Luke) who sits at a table while Paul lays on his mat. Paul, who has known starvation, imprisonment, and has been closer to death than most of us would ever know, realizes that his days on this orb are growing shorter and shorter. Yes, he had thought that Jesus would return in his lifetime — had not all the Apostles thought so as well? Now, with the lights fading and the curtains closing, he pens what may be his last epistle of any kind, to Timothy, his adopted son in the ministry.
The words of II Timothy flow with a passion and power that one can only imagine would go with statements that come at such a time as this. There are practical words, words of encouragement and hope, words of warnings and of dangers. In the 3rd and 4th chapters Paul’s tone grows intensely personal, reminding Timothy of Paul’s own difficulties in preaching the gospel and of the calling to live a godly, dedicated life. He compares himself to the drink offering (libation) that was poured on the altar as a symbol of one’s devotion to Christ. He is completely spent — all that he could give and more, he has given to his Lord, Christ Jesus. Now, he relates his final testimony as to how he had spent his life upon this earth, i.e., how he understood where he was, where he had been, and what he had been about.
As for me, I am already being poured out as a libation, and the time of my departure has come. (v. 6) The word for departure (v.6) has several images by which it can be understood:

• A ship which sets sail, leaving home port for a destination overseas.
  
• An army which, upon hearing that the war is over, breaks camp and heads for home.
  Paul saw his approaching death to be not something over which he was to be dismayed, but the culmination of his vocation to which he had been true his entire life. Let’s look at these verses for some guidance as many of us move into the twilight years of our lives.
  I have fought the good fight...
  Let us realize with Paul that there is a fight worth waging. Life is a struggle, even in the best of times. So often we find ourselves at odds with one another, with those who see and believe differently than do we. However, church or denominational or theological infighting or even fighting opposition in the world is not to what Paul is referring in this instance. Paul is talking, I believe, about the inner fight we wage with ourselves, with our lesser demons and those drives which are ever urging us to behaviors and activities with are less than what God has called us to be. In Romans 8, Galatians, and other passages from his letters we find Paul calling us to live at the level of the Spirit and not at the level of flesh. This is due to Paul’s own experience, his personal wrestling with the desires which inhabit all of us. How does he put it in Romans? “The good that I would I do not...and that which I do not wish to do, that very thing I find myself doing.”

All of us wrestle with human desires which, if controlled and used appropriately, are wonderful gifts of God. Used out of the bounds of God’s will and they become weapons of mass destruction.

• Sex — the desire to reproduce and leave behind offspring combined with the need to love and be loved.
  
• Hunger — the desire to eat and feed our bodies;
  
• Power — the desire to control and shape whatever endeavor in which we engage ourselves;
  
• Wealth — the desire to have security and ease of life;
  
• Ego — the desire to elevate ourselves above others and so feel that we are more than average.
  All of these desires dwell within us — and all of these rear their ugly heads at one time or another. When controlled by us they are good. When uncontrolled they become demonic and destructive, both of us and of others around us.
  Each of us struggles with one or more of these in some form or fashion. This struggle goes with being a fallen human being — we call it “original sin.” If Paul was like most persons who accomplish great deeds, then he had a tremendous ego. (I think most scholars would agree on that.) Paul thought he knew better and more clearly the truth and importance of the gospel than others and he worked to preach and promote his version. In fact, he did so well that Paul’s version ultimately wins out. Now, to be sure there are a lot of time where Paul is right: circumcision, the Gospel for Gentiles as well as Jews, the triumph of grace over law, etc. However, there are also times where Paul seems to have been caught by culture — women and their place in the church, etc. Whatever the issue, Paul had an opinion and was willing to advocate for it.
  Paul’s internal battle was, I believe, over his ego and inflated opinion of himself and his abilities. Now, to be sure the Spirit of God continually worked within Paul to battle him over this flaw. This is why Paul saw it as a battle that was continually being waged. The reality is that we never fully conquer the forces to which we are particularly susceptible. Ultimately we surrender them to Christ and allow the Spirit of Christ to control them and us — and in so doing we know the victory which only comes through the Spirit.
  If we do not wage this fight, this battle, then we will discover ourselves dominated and eventually destroyed by our drives and desires. I cannot tell you the number of talented, gifted, and highly intelligent persons whom I have known who literally destroyed their lives and those of their family because they refused to fight the good fight. Rather than allow the Spirit to lift them over these temptations, they give in to them time again, believing that God’s grace will forgive them. While it is true that God’s grace washes clean, the reality is that when we surrender rather than fight, we condemn ourselves to a lifetime of disappointment, destruction and regret. How was it the poet put it? 1“Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.”
  

I have finished the race...
Paul not only knew that there was a fight worth waging, there was a race worth finishing. Paul loved to use athletic and militaristic images for our lives of faith, and one of which was life as a race. One of the saddest moments in all of ministry is to see people drop out of active service for our Lord Jesus Christ, to quit the race before they finish it. Life is not a sprint, it is a marathon — and faithful service to our Lord requires us to finish our particular race. Perseverance is one of the traits of a true follower of and believer in Jesus Christ. The gospels and the epistles warn the church that there will always be those who claim to love and follow Jesus, but when push comes to shove more often than not they are nowhere to be found.
The last time I checked Christian service had no retirement age. There is no age at which one can say, “I’ve done my part...I can just sit back and relax.” The challenge of building a community of faith and impacting a culture for Jesus Christ is so massive and huge that it requires all of us to be involved and engaged.
One of the great challenges of church is that though the gospel ever remains the same, the methodology and culture within which we function does change. Trust me on this one...I have literally spent my entire ministry watching it change. Sometimes, when change comes faster or in ways that we do not appreciate or understand, we have the desire to just step back or quit altogether. This “I will take my ball and go home” attitude is so sad, because it reflects an attitude which is not indicative of faith in and commitment to our Lord Jesus Christ. Rather than ask ourselves what is it that Christ is calling us to do and where Christ desires us to serve in order that our church might go forward, we can become angry, resentful and even belligerent.
Several years ago a man and his son planned out a significant hike from British Columbia to California — over 1000 miles. In their planning they discovered that 90% of those who set out to hike over 500 miles never finish. A full 50% quit before they ever begin and another 40% quit after starting. When looking at the 10% who finish he concluded that they were successful for a few reasons:

• They strenuously prepared themselves, physically and mentally.
  
• They undertook meticulous logistical preparation.
  
• They knew that the biggest obstacles lay within themselves. They knew and anticipated that there would be problems; all would not go well. They committed to finishing no matter what. When trouble arose they were not surprised or flustered. They just knew that they had to find a way through the challenge, and then to keep going.2
  Last year the Boston Marathon was marred by explosions which killed and maimed hundreds. There were thousands who did not get to finish — and finishing is what it is all about to a marathoner. This year they returned to finish the race which they were unable to do so a year ago. Why? It’s just a race, isn't it? No, it is not a race — it is life itself. A true marathoner runs not as much against others as against themselves. So it is with our Christian faith. Life is a marathon — and we are called to be faithful until God calls us home.
  I have kept the faith...
  

Paul was genuinely proud of the fact that he had not altered or corrupted his faith in Jesus Christ — for he knew that we have a faith worth keeping. Despite beatings, arrest, imprisonment and even being near death on several occasions, Paul affirmed and maintained his basic core belief: salvation and eternal life were found supremely in Jesus Christ. The reality is that we have a truth worth keeping, worth giving our lives to and holding onto throughout the ups and downs of life.
It is so easy to give up our “faith” in Christ. Every age has it’s particular “hip” theology which compels people to participate. As humans we are made to worship something — and if we do not worship God through Jesus Christ we will worship a human god made in our image. It is so easy to give up true, hard-earned faith for one which says, “Do what you want...believe what you will...it does not matter.” There are so many “quasi-Christian” groups which maintain an image of respectability but which are in fact heretical or false versions of Christianity.
The most prolific of these in our age is the “prosperity gospel,” which maintains that God wants us all to be wealthy and “blessed.” I wonder what Paul would have said about that? I wonder how Paul, being beaten and bruised beyond recognition, would feel about his words being twisted and changed to reflect a theology totally at odds with historic Christianity. The true faith knows the difficulties of life and the mystery that we cannot understand it all, but maintains faithfulness no matter what.
A few weeks ago I was discussing with a fellow minister (and congregant) the current direction of the contemporary church in terms of full fledged Christian rock services, etc. (So much more out there than we are, trust me.) He listened to me and then said, “You sound like the old people we knew when we started ministry...they thought we were destroying the church as well.” I had to laugh at myself: Bob, the one time ministerial rebel who flayed against the ivy covered walls of the institutional church, has now become the domesticated defender of the institution — and the very person against whom he once caricatured.
No matter how much the church changes, as long as those changes enable us to share the gospel and live out the gospel with integrity in our culture, then I am going to be there. Why? Because we are engaged in a race worth finishing, a race through which our participation and finishing demonstrates to the world its truthfulness. If my faith will not see me full to the finish, how will it ever see me through death to life eternal?
What is the result? Paul used the image of a “crown of righteousness,” i.e., the laurel wreath which the judge awarded to the victor at the Olympic games. Unlike the Olympics where medals are only given to those who win, all of those who are faithful to the finish receive the victor’s crown. For we are not racing against each other...we are racing together. The goal is finishing, not merely starting.
Some years ago at the Seattle Special Olympics nine contestants were gathered at the starting line for the 100-meter dash. The gun went off and they began to run. They were about halfway through the race when one boy stumbled, fell, rolled over on the asphalt, and began to cry. The other eight heard the boy, stopped, and returned to him. Every one of them. One girl with Down’s syndrome bent down and kissed him and said, “This will make it better.” Then all nine

linked arms and walked to the finish line together. The stadium exploded with cheering for over ten minutes.3 They all receive the winner’s prize.
A fight worth waging...a race worth finishing...a faith worth keeping. No matter what our age, may God find us faithful in being the church he has called us to be. Our days may grow short, but our impact and influence and service for Christ can be as great as ever.
Robert U. Ferguson, Jr., Ph.d. Emerywood Baptist Church
1300 Country Club Drive
High Point, North Carolina 27262 May 4th, 2014
1John Greenleaf Whittier, Maud Muller — Pamphlet.
2 Dr. Ray Pritchard, "Finishing Well," keepbelieving.com
3 Author unknown. Printed as told by Bob French in A 3rd Serving of Chicken Soup for the Soul, ed. By Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, Health Communications Inc., 1966, Deerfield Beach, Florida, p.70.